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What I Learned from A Meme: What I Asked for, What I got

Memes about a hairstyle that a client asked for versus what the stylist did crack me up. I’m not sure if this is good or bad. Recently I was chuckling about a meme when I realized something: God can relate to the disappointment and frustration of the clients that post the epic fails. These clients were hoping to be satisfied with what they asked for. There was an image or design they had in mind that wasn’t delivered.

As I consider this concept closely I think of times that I’ve sat in a chair or two and was spun around less than satisfied with what the stylist did to my hair. I was frustrated because I showed a picture-more than one knowing me, and was guaranteed by the stylist that they could do it. Ultimately, I was frustrated because I felt like I was lied to, used-assured just so that I would give them my hard-earned money, and completely fooled. Interestingly enough, I can recall a couple of stylists that were proud of their work for whatever reason. Maybe they felt that they should have gotten an “A for effort.”

Imagine how God must feel when He asks for things like obedience, faith, consistency, love, growth, holiness, etc. but gets things less than satisfactory like Plan B’s, riding the fence, overriding the Holy Spirit, broken promises, and so on. How about when we don’t do what He tells us but still pride ourselves and expect the A for effort? Granted He’s our father and knows that we will fall short, we should still purpose in our hearts to please Him. The content and intentions of our heart are everything!

Grace and peace,


Why #NoLivesMatter

I believe it’s human nature to gravitate towards people we identify with. It’s not always physical characteristics; it can be beliefs, political parties, tax brackets, age groups, and etc.  This is what has prompted me to consider #NoLivesMatter closely.  Some may hate the very thought of such a concept but the issues that we are seeing today present all the facts.  Based on my observation, everyone wants to be acknowledged.  There’s nothing wrong with wanting acknowledgement.  It becomes problematic when one group (or person) cannot allow another group (or person) to “be great.”   There is a growing controversy between #BlackLivesMatter and #AllLivesMatter.  In the wake of cries for justice some believe that identifying the significance of black lives is an attempt to omit the importance of other lives.  The very fact that lives matter has to be mentioned should raise concerns.  Our society is self-centered.  It seems that no life can matter without being interpreted as a threat towards another. The problem with “lives mattering” is the absence of balance and consideration for others. As long as humanity continues in self-centered perspectives and actions, no lives will ever matter with the exception of an individual’s own.  We were prepackaged to love and be loved.  Here’s my take:


-EACH AND EVERY PERSON MATTERS. When a person says “black lives matter” it does not mean that black lives are solely important.  It expresses the sentiment that some of the injustices we’ve seen were or are racially biased.  Additionally, while we communicate black lives matter, we as African Americans should ensure that we do not focus solely on “black lives” because social injustice is occurring across the board.


-There is a vicious cycle occurring.  Citizens become afraid of Police. Police get on edge or “leery” of citizens. Citizens distrust the justice system.  The system distrusts citizens. Does that justify the “trigger finger syndrome?” Absolutely not. But I believe that we should consider two things at minimum: (1) Not all cops are bad cops (2) when they hit the clock for their shifts they want to return home to their lives and families in one piece.


-We all have a role to play:
    Parents have responsibilities to teach their children how to respond to particular situations. This statement does not mean that teaching has not taken place.

    We have to know our rights.  There’s no time for assumptions or DIY responses from social media.

    We have to be consistent. What’s happening should not be dropped when the media drops it.

    We have to be informed.  Please understand that the media does its job well. Respond to facts. Let’s not get caught in race wars, hidden agendas, or fads.

    Lastly, although I know people don’t want to read this word: pray.  Pray for justice. Pray for wisdom in how to interact with others.  Pray for government officials to act with wisdom and integrity.  Pray for wisdom in how to promote and execute change.  Is prayer all that we need? Heavens no! But prayer should be in the forefront of our responses as it should be anywhere else (He will direct our paths in all of our ways if we acknowledge him).

Everyone is not going to acknowledge, accept, or agree that the bloodshed is senseless and inhumane.  That’s okay. Stay focused and play your part in bringing about change. Rise above division and fads. Make love and share it.

My Journey from Pampering to Perfection

Before everything begins I should probably explain that this entry is a reflection of my work in progress; thus, this entry will be as well.  I am the third of three children.  I am the baby by “ a long shot.”  Both of my siblings, a brother and sister, are significantly older than me.  My parents are very loving and supportive.  As a child, I did not want for anything.  It was like my support system was on a ten all the time: my mom and dad got me what I asked for and my sister followed up with what they did not to ensure that I was trendy (hair, nails, clothes, and etc).  As a result I became spoiled; I also became particular in that I wanted: what I wanted, when I wanted it, and how I wanted it.  At the age of 20 I wrote a 10-year plan that included my boyfriend at that time, a law degree, his job as a Spanish interpreter and children.  9 Years later I literally have none of the previously listed.  Not that that’s a bad thing. The 10-year plan was written without consulting God.  I was not born again then.  Now, I am single, a mental health professional with no children.  I am seeking God for what he will have me to do, go, help, and etc.  As I continue to grow in His grace I learn more.  One of the biggest learning experiences for me has been that of perfection: getting on the potter’s wheel; opening my heart to God exposing my wickedness, hopes, dreams, plans and giving him free reign to do what he sees fit to his vessel.  God has shown me that he wants to use me and I want it to be optimal.  I’ll admit, I had a season that I wanted to be in “ministry” so badly.  Imagine my surprise when I learned the least common denominator of true ministry is servitude.  Servitude caused me to learn other things such as selflessness and humility-neither of which have been easy for me.  My concept of getting what I want and operating within my own will are challenged daily as I strive to be perfected: letting patience have her perfect work, walking out Matthew 5:44, humbling myself in the presence of God to be exalted in his time, resisting envy,… the list goes on and on.  There are days that my carnality would have me to run to what I know to be comfortable.  Some days it’s a struggle to put one foot in front of the other in fear of what may or may not come next.  This process has provided me with a preview of what it means to trust God.  It has also taught me that it must be ongoing, it is essential, and that there is no other way.  As I continue in transparency I will admit that there are times I would like God to pamper me: respond to my calls in urgency just like my daddy would, pat me up when I’m crying-whole 9.  It's a beautiful experience in the natural.  However, in the spirit I am learning that I have to learn to wait.  I have to learn to humble myself.  I have to be disciplined. These are all factors of being a soldier.  Even as I type God has just reminded me that if my father knows how to give me good gifts, how much more does He? With that said, I’ll sign off here.